CAT WEEK: separate apartments


I have a love-hate relationship with my cats; Skeletor and Casey Jones. I love falling asleep cuddling with a kitty, but I hate waking up before the sunrise to kitten paws punching me in the face. I love always having 2 adorable bundles of purring fur to watch tv with me, but I hate that no matter how often I sweep, there’s always litter all over my apartment floor.

Some days, I wish I were to suddenly develop cat allergies so that I would, sadly, be forced to send them to live elsewhere. Some days, I wish I had more cats so that I could bury myself under a mountain of cats and live happily ever after.

If a sudden windfall of cash were to fall in my lap, I would not buy myself a vintage pink cadillac or take a trip to Thailand. Nope. I would rent the apartment directly across the hall from mine so that my cats can have a place of their very own. Their very own catpartment.

I would furnish this catpartment with countless cat beds and cat towers and cat jungle gyms and scratch posts. I would also move my couch and television into this catpartment, so that the cats can invite Walter and I over to watch tv with them while they nap. I imagine Walter would fall asleep most evenings over at the catpartment. Around 2 am when the kitties start fighting loudly with a cardboard box, he’ll be able to sleepily stumble across the hall into our bed.

In this dream world where my cats have their own place, I would be able to place a bathroom rug on the bathroom floor without having to worry about Casey Jones peeing on it. In this dream world, I will be able to leave loose change on my bedside table without having to wake up to the sound of Skeletor pawing my change onto the floor. In this dream world, I won’t have to get frantic when Skeletor and Casey Jones climb up onto the kitchen counter because it will be THEIR kitchen counter (and not a place where food is prepared.)

I have big dreams.

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