Gawd but the Internet seems to be full of advice these days. If you’re not sick you need to be spending your time worried about getting sick, while eating only superfoods regardless of the seasonal availability of fruits or how darn annoying it is to peal a pomegranate, (bright red stains on everything anyone?) If you’re not worried about getting sick, can I interest you in worrying about how your favorite fictional characters are doing?
I know it’s mostly my own fault. Facebook probably already knows that I’m a bit of a worrier, and I imagine that the more of these things I click on, the more I’m going to be inundated with, but still. Make. It. Stop.
This week the Internet was full of helpful tidbits that I’d rather not think about. Here are five terribly inconvenient things I learned this week:
Today, I’m feeling pretty great about my body. Maybe its because of my diet and exercise regime. Maybe its because in a recent bout of stomach flu, I expelled an insane amount of bodily fluids and had zero desire for food for 2 days. I guess we’ll never know. Most likely I’m feeling pretty great about my body because I was sick and now I am better. Being sick forced me to listen to my body. And I intend to keep on doing that well past my wedding day.
Winter has really been kicking the crap out of me lately! Between the cold, the colds, the dryness, and the general malaise, I’ve not been handling the colder months so well. I have a new plan people, and it’s expensive! Turns out, like so many other things in life, this is a problem that you can throw money at! I’ve discovered a new thing, for a measly thousands of dollars, you can go lay on a beach and drink all day somewhere tropical right in the heart of wintertime! Did you know this was a thing? There’s all kinds of white sandy beaches with giant hotels perched on them where you can go drink your face off and swim in blue blue ocean to your hearts content. All you need is a credit card!
The snowbirds have the right idea. You know what is great for SAD? Getting the hell out of dodge and blasting your skin with way too much sun for a week. Lucky for you, after two amazing sun destination trips I have become an expert on what to pack for these adventures. Here is what you need to bring:
We got a new toilet, Mike live-tweeted the whole thing. It was not widely re-tweeted. Turns out that not that many of our friends and followers want to hear about our bathroom adventures.
As I see it, the world of romance is sharply divided between couples who enjoy toilet humor and couples who don’t. Mike and I fall squarely into the former category. Not only do we fart in front of each other, but we’ll fart and then start singing a song about it. Continue reading
This soup! So easy, lazy and good. I probably make it more than once a week. There are just so many nights when I can’t be bothered to cook. I say to my comedy fiancé, how about I just make that soup? And he actually gets excited. Every time! He loves this soup, sometimes he even requests it. I think our running title at home is soup of destiny, but we call a lot of things that. I like it too, even though I usually feel like I really got away with something when I make it. A bit of peeling, throw everything in a pot, and then wait one hour, it couldn’t be easier. Ready? Let’s make soup! Continue reading